Presidents Day weekend - *warning*: LOTS OF PHOTOS!!!

Jeff's parents recently bought a winter home in Hurricane, Utah. We've been down to visit them a couple of times, and since the kids had a long weekend with Parent Teacher Conferences and the Presidents Day holiday, we decided this would be another good opportunity. They took us out on the ATVs to see Peekaboo Canyon. The weather was beautiful - we didn't even need jackets until we got inside the canyon.

The kids had a great time in the back of Kawi (Richard and Anna's Kawasaki side-by-side):

At our picnic spot just before entering the canyon:

Just to the side of the entrance there was a short trail that led to this spire:

Michael just inside the entrance to Peekaboo Canyon:

Lauren:

A couple views of the slot canyon:

Faith showing us her "giraffe move":

Lauren showing us her chicken dance:

I can't get over this sassy little thing. I swear she never poses with just a smile. It's always this face:

A little detour:

Stretching to see if they could touch both sides at once:

This is how Jeff chose to do it:

Ah! They got it! (In another area of the canyon):

More views of the narrow passage:

Faith found herself a shelf:

The only greenery in the canyon was this moss growing on the side:

A final view:

It was a fun trip. The second day we were there was Sunday. Jeff and I took the kids to sacrament meeting. What a crazy, crowded event that was! The bishop announced that there were 60 additional people there from a Lacrosse team, but that didn't begin to explain how crowded the chapel was. We were lucky to find a seat. The entire cultural hall was full of chairs, which were full of people - and several families sat out in the foyer for the entire meeting.

After church, Jeff and I went hiking on the anticline, while Richard and Anna took the kids on the ATVs out to Sand Hollow State Park. Michael got to drive some, which he loved, and the girls got to climb rocks, which they loved. So all in all, everyone had a good time.

These photos were taken by Anna out at Sand Hollow:

Here is a view of the anticline - it's this ridge that extends for miles and miles. We climbed up to the top and then followed it for a little way - maybe 3/4 of a mile. It was pretty cool once you got up there, but that was a steep climb!

On Monday, Jeff's parents left early to spend the day with some friends. We packed up, cleaned up, and locked up, then headed up to Heber City. We met my family for dinner at Don Pedro's. Then the plan was to go to the ice castles in Midway. Apparently that was the plan of 25% of the state. Holy smokes, that place was crowded! We had purchased our tickets ahead of time, and then found out that it would be the last night the ice castles would be open. The warm weather is melting them, and there are concerns about the safety of attendees. By the time we got there, the wait to get inside was an hour and a half. No thank you. They will honor our tickets next year, so wait we will. Instead, we walked around the outside and saw what we could. The kids (and adults) thought the ice castles were beautiful.

Aren't they beautiful? We can't wait to go inside next season!

Tori's gift

I had one of those experiences that are beautiful and terrible all at the same time yesterday. My aunt Jodi called me and told me that SHE had just received a phone call from a friend who I'll call Susan. Susan is a member of Jodi's ward. They are friends, but not particularly close. Anyway, Susan called her and explained that she had just been woken up by a dream, in which she saw Jodi holding a tiny baby girl. When she woke, she knew she had to call her. So she did, and explained that her daughter had just had a miscarriage. Susan didn't know why she had dreamed about Jodi holding this baby girl, but she knew that Jodi must have some experience or information to share that could help her daughter cope. She had been promised in a blessing that her baby would be okay, and so naturally, to lose the baby was devastating and confusing.

Jodi told her that she had never had a miscarriage, so she wasn't sure what she could offer. Susan insisted that there must be something - after all, she wasn't in the habit of dreaming about Jodi. So Jodi told her that there was one time when she held a tiny, beautiful, perfect baby girl. Susan asked if there was any way she could talk to me, and Jodi agreed to call and ask.

There have been several times over the last seven years when I have talked to people about Tori. But always before, I have been approached by someone who had a sister or a friend who lost a baby, and they wanted to know the best way to help their friend. This was different. I was being asked to share what I had learned personally about overcoming the grief and devastation. What I knew about facing the absence of Church doctrine and revelation and still maintaining a hope in the Resurrection and in personal revelation.

I agreed to talk to Susan, and told Jodi she could give her my phone number. Less than 10 minutes passed before the phone rang. I have to admit I was still not prepared. Susan introduced herself and said that she had talked with Jodi, who thought I might have some insight to offer.

I began by telling her how sorry I was that her daughter had to deal with this. Then I told her the short version of my story. I told her how I woke up bleeding one day, and that the doctor said my placenta had torn. I was put on bed rest. Susan said that it was the same with her daughter - a torn placenta and bed rest. I recounted how I was on and off of bed rest for a month, and that during that time, I was called to the Primary presidency. In the blessing that Bishop Bowthorpe gave me when he set me apart, he promised me that my pregnancy would be successful.

I started to cry as I told her what almost no one knows - that when he said those words, I immediately received one of the most powerful impressions of my life: If I could have my baby girl in the Resurrection, then this pregnancy was successful. I think part of me knew then that we would lose her.

I have faith in that promise from my bishop.

I went on to tell her about some of the things that helped me through the days following Tori's death; about the statements I found from Church leaders that comforted me; about the book Gone Too Soon. I especially told her how important it was to me that she not be forgotten - how my mom makes blankets every year and donates them to Utah Share; how Jodi calls me and takes me to lunch around Tori's birthday; how we talk about her in our family.

I hope that what I told Susan was helpful. I hope her daughter can find peace.

Losing Tori was perhaps the hardest thing I have ever gone through. But the lessons I have learned from it are among the most beautiful. I am always grateful to have the opportunity to help others who are experiencing something similar. I call it Tori's gift. It's the gift she gave to me, so that I could give it to others.